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Writer's pictureJoanne Callan

Is it time to talk about death?


As we approach Halloween/Samhain a time when our ancient ancestors honoured the season of darkness and death as part of the continuous cycle of life, death and rebirth.


It would seem like an ok time to bring up the topic that many of us avoid like the plague.


Our ancestors had a deep acceptance and understanding that death was an inevitable part of life.


In recent months I have found myself wondering as we become a more secular society is it more difficult for us to accept our own mortality and the death of those that we love.


A number of years ago I went through a very difficult time in my life, that was in part triggered by the death of two people that I was very close to. I was saddened at their loss however that wasn’t really the issue. I was frightened and fearful at losing people even closer to me and it brought up lots of deeper “stuff” in the months and years afterwards I have worked in healing that “stuff” exploring death, loss, abandonment and many other topics.


My next key lessons came from a friend who was terminally ill she reminded me when I was leaving her unsure if it was the last time I would see her that I could be dead before her and to let her know that I was home safe. She also reminded me that there were worse things than dying.


It has been my thoughts for many years that whilst the conversation around Euthanasia is an important one perhaps the more important one to have is do we as a society keep people alive past the stage when there life would naturally end and is that the right thing to do?


“You only live once.”

“Wrong. You only die once. You live every day.” 


The Dash Poem


“I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates on the tombstone from the beginning... to the end.

He noted that first came the date of birth and spoke of the following date with tears, but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.”


In recent months these questions seem all the more relevant.


As difficult as it is for us to explore


The only guarantee is life is death.


Everyone wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die.



I highly recommend reading Anita Moorjani Book’s Dying To Be Me & What If This Is Heaven.



For all those experiencing grief or fear around death at the moment reach out and get support I will signpost if I can.


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